It’s the day after Thanksgiving and me and my faithful pup Lili are pulling another 12 hour shift.we spent our Thanksgiving here at the porn store. While I’m not exactly thankful for this I am glad I have this job and that I can bring Lili into work with me when my partner is out of town like he is now for Thanksgiving.
What else am I thankful for…sexually?
I’m Thankful for…
1. The internet.
Anonymous, or semi anonymous sex was fairly easy to find as a gay man, at least since the 1970’s. I could go to a bathhouse, a bar or an adult bookstore like the one I am writing from. But with the rise of the internet, which became a big part of the lives of most Americans during my early 20’s, The hooking up landscape changed forever. First with chat rooms (gay.com) then hook up sites (manhunt was the first I remember) and now phone apps (grindr can tell me how many feet away the next person who might want to suck my cock is) hooking up has never been easier.
Although it came too late for me, young gay men, old gay men, porn stars, sex workers, basically anyone in a high risk group who had insurance can take a pill a day and be about 99% sure that they can Fuck all they want without a condom and not get H.I.V. Prep is the name for this new method of HIV prevention. That’s pretty fucking cool.
3.Young guys with Daddy issues.
The older I get the easier it seems it is for me to hook up. Sure there are tons of twinks who won’t hook up with anyone over 25, but there are plenty of hot young guys who are especially interested in men old enough to be their fathers or l grandfathers. Because i look younger than 41, I swear, I am not fully reaping the benefits of the guys with an absent father or pervert older , but it’s something to look forward to.The idea that being gay at 40 is like being dead is no longer true.
4. The open relationship.
Before I met my man, the longest relationship I ever had was a month, maybe two. The second I started dating someone I was thinking of excuses for why we should break up. There were many reasons for this but the biggest one was my inability to be sexually monogamous. The thought of having one sexual partner for the rest of my life is truly terrifying. And unrealistic. It just wasn’t going to happen. I have a thing for anonymous sex. I’d rather not even exchange names in most cases. Putting me in a monogamous relationship is putting me in a situation where I will cheat. And even if I’m not cheating I will be suspicious that my partner is. Meet the crazy side of me who will check his phone, email, and question him constantly. Now I don’t have to do that. We trust each other not to fall in love with others and if we start to then we trust that the other well end things with that person. Cheating takes on a whole different meaning in this context and it is something I rarely worry about.As of August my fiance and I have been together a for as decade. Continue reading “Five Things I’m Thankful For…sexually”